Who needs Disney Land when you can go by bus

This is the schedule...Cuzco to Santa Maria(5/6 hours) Santa Maria to Santa Theresa (2 Hrs) EASY Hey! These are the facts, below is the reality! I know this is a long blog, but to shorten it would be an injustice.
Bus leaves on time...all is going well. The first hour is sales hour. First selling sweets, then a man who droned on for what seemed like forever, selling ginseng tablets and hand cream! After an hour we stop, apparently the driver now has breakfast, so we must all get off and have breakfast too, lots of women outside bus selling corn and cheese for one sole...Driver finishes, we all get back on!
Second Stop, an hour later... driver pops head through rear of bus and shouts Quieren Bano, muy tranquil. Want the toilet...very calm...So Everyone one gets off. Men wee against slope of mountain, women wee on downhill side. Is this just an unspoken rule?
Third Stop...yes it goes on. We come to massive river that has broken through due to rain, and is now taking over major dip in road. Two buses in front of us. Each bus seems to come alive and almost takes on the personality of horse that is trying to be guided into something it really does not want to do! Somehow, half covered in water, bus makes it through. Our turn...close my eyes, and hold shoulders in upward position!
Despite all these stops, it is the most amazing bus journey, high up in the mountains, and then down again, only to repeat this up down pattern. At one stage we were driving through the clouds, and yet the plants, when close, were the most amazing colours of green that you have ever seen.
Fourth Stop... Stop at massive waterfall. You can´t over it or under it, so yes we go through massive, gushing waterfall. Which seemed to be normal for the rest of the journey. Not sure why, but was sitting on left side window, somehow whenever I looked down saw nothing, we were driving on each on mountain, now again I would watch a few rocks fall down. Thought they were meant to drive on the right side. Am told now, that they stay away from mountain slope, as mud slides are more dangerous. My stomach was in a constant knot, that ease at moments and others not. The scenes were truly the most amazing I have ever seen, despite me feeling that my life was the most vulnerable it has ever been. Just one little slip, and that would be the end.
Get to Santa Maria, most of the people by now know that is my stop and jump up to tell me. Made it, thank driver, beyond thanking, and think he is mad to do this journey every day.
Now this is where the simple plan all fades!
Start waiting for combi for Santa Theresa. Then after waiting half an hour, man next to me (with Limp) says it is best if we hitch a ride, as roads are too bad and there might not be a combi till the next morning. My desperation to get there makes me comply. So Limping Man and me walk down road, round corner, over bridge and wait on this concrete slab, joined by an old lady and another man, who had the loveliest smile. All want the same thing, a car to Santa Theresa.
Smiling Man stops cars, but none so far. Eventually, a truck like bus thing comes along. It is going halfway....up the hill again. Why does it have to be up and down mountains... This time road is not a road, but a mud path. Bus thing must be a front wheel drive, as each time we turn the corner, back just slides round. Sitting at left window again, have obviously not learnt that it is not the best place, watching wheel slip behind me, and keep thinking....this is truly it, my last moment of life. BUT no, as I am still here. Finally stop. Big commotion. The mud path as fallen away and there is only a road about 1 meter wide. Everyone gets out. Women chat, men get spades from back, and dig into mountain to create a wider road. This takes over an hour. We all walk across, two drivers pick sticks, to see who will be the one to drive across. He makes it miraculously! Finally we get to the final stop, which is only half way. Please note by now it is dark, and according to plan I was meant to be in Santa Theresa by three! Get off with Smiling Man, Limping Man, Lady with two children and an old man with a torch!
We all walk a little bit, am told it is only a "poco mas" little more. Should have know already then....(Peru and time distinction are not well coordinated) Limping Man can no longer carry on. So Smiling Man walks up to a big house, and asks if Limping Man can stay for the night. Now it is only Smiling Man and me left. Walking in the absolute dark, on a road that is falling away and full of waterfalls. Had to keep holding his hand as he guided me through dodgy parts. Then remember I have a torch! Walking for about an hour, and I question him on his little bit more theory and find out we have still two hours to walk. Am now nervous, because it is dark, do not know where I am, nothing in sight, except for Smiling Man who I have to put my faith into and hope it all works out. Keep looking at sky, which has the most beautiful starry scene, and it seems to calm me down.
Just when I think this will never end, a combi arrives, packed! Including Limping Man. Won´t let us in, I am about to lose my calm cool and beg on hands and knees when Smiling Man is already sitting on top and giving me his hand to pull me up. (There was a small group returning, and combi thought we were all together.) Feel combi moving, and have vision of Smiling man gone and me alone in the jungle with no direction! Strong hand grabs me and other group lift me up, and there we go! Smiling Man tells driver there are only two. All goes well for a while, think it is all fine, when we stop. Big waterfall, massive rapids. (Please Lord don´t make me walk anymore.) All get off. Driver and others jump knee and thigh deep into river, to see how strong the rapids are and where it is shallower. Other men chop down tree and make bridge for us to walk over. Combi somehow makes it over....combi on other side decides not to risk it, and turns around. Back on top. Finally, what seemed like a good hour of driving in all (which would mean another three hours walking) Smiling Man gets off, shows me his house and gives me a load of instructions about hostal and bus prices. Sad to seem him go, give him the biggest thank you hug. Am told there is now space downstairs, girls all shift up and fuss over me. Drive into town, mention I need a hostal, which sends whole combi into discussion.... (Which on is nicer...) Boy pops up from nowhere, and takes me to hostal which belongs to his dad. At the back of lovely restaurant that closes at eight. It is already nine, but man makes a big rice and vegetable dish for me. Am so glad to be somewhere safe, and warm, fall asleep listening to Banana Pancakes, wondering how I got here!

Despite it being the maddest day, I can truly say it was the best. There were so many times when my head was saying, what the hell are you doing, yet my heart had to trust, there was really no choice. Was told not to be nervous, as the people in the jungle are friendly and calm, I was more likely to die from a mud slide or dodgy mountain edge. Great! For those who want a cheaper version of going to Machu Picchu, don´t be put off. This was the most amazing route, with the loveliest people, the most devine sites you have ever seen. And there were no tourists! I would wait till the rain stopped next time!